The Sporting Cock & One Other
Group C for chuffed, this is a great group. You’ve got a European gentry in France, your thinking man’s favourite tip, the TV tottytastic Danes to please both the watching men and women, I know my wife can’t resist a man in a viking helmet (Jehram insert horn gag here), the 70’s nostalgic Peru when world cups were simpler and the old enemy, no not that one, not that one, no, no, no, yes that one, Australia.
This is also Group C for chance, as in second chance, whilst France stormed their group, Denmark, Peru and the lot from down under all qualified through play off games.
France – FIFA ranking 7, World Cup 2018 odds 7/1
France qualified back in October last year having only lost one game in UEFA Group A to an extra time Swedish winner, take that garlic cheats, whilst it won’t make up for Henry’s handball this son of an Irish women will take anything. That aside Les Bleus have an air of class of late, they took a while to warm up to the world cup and just like the Saints had a great 1980’s where they got to the semis two tournaments in a row. But unlike the hapless Saints they went one better (technically two better) and won the thing in 1998, but they needed home soil to help them, cough cough.
They bombed out of next tournament and then made the next final and then bombed out again, so as the cliché goes will it depend on what France team turns up. No not this time, you could bet your onion bag they will get out of this group with ease, but who will join them?
Saints connection – our best ever player has a French surname, from the word for weaver which is nice and he reputedly said non when Les Bleus came-a-knocking, which is nicer.
Denmark - FIFA ranking 12, World Cup 2018 odds 100/1
Denmark came second in their group and faltered in their quest for automatic qualification with a shock home loss to Montenegro and a failure to beat Romania, which sounds a bit like an England World Cup group campaign. But they smashed down the door to Russia in Dublin when after going one nil down, a green meltdown helped the Danes romp to a 1-5 win with a hat-trick from Eriksen the north London yobbo.
So a part of me should be antiviking, but how can you be with a nation that is the home of Lego, bacon and hygge. That is the art of creating a warm atmosphere, which their fans will create with their blonde hair and their national flag adorned cheeks. The Roligans, as they are known, are the opposite to hooligans with rolig being Danish for calm; they will brighten the terraces but only for a short period as the Hummelers (I couldn’t find a nickname which is obligatory in these write ups) don’t normally hang around for too long.
Saints connection – our very own Pierre-Emile Højbjerg who got his first goal for his country in a 2-1 win in the qualifying group. Good luck PEH.
Peru - FIFA ranking 11, World Cup 2018 odds 150/1
Rooting for the Kiwis in the OFC–CONMEBOL qualification play-off, we all choose a team in this fixture right, I followed the result at work and sadly experienced another football failure, its lucky I have been in training for that all my sporting life. My wife is a Kiwi although she was brought up in Kent, and it would have been nice to see a nation from the only region to not have an automatic qualifying spot. But alas it was Peru who progressed, who themselves were pipped at the post by one point to Columbia, after drawing with them in their last qualifying game.
They don’t have much of a world cup pedigree; they beat Scotland 3-1 in 1978 with the brilliant Clive James stating that the Peruvians had ‘revealed an ability to run faster with the ball than the Scots could run without it’. But as I said they don’t have much of a world cup pedigree and their greatest triumph was possibly a 1-1 draw against Italy with a late goal, which put Italy in danger of not qualifying from their group until they catenaccioed they way out with a third draw, before going on to win the bloody thing. Incidentally the 1982 World Cup was the one where there was a second round of group games, which England, after winning all their first round games, drew their two second round games and went out of the World Cup with out losing a match. Fortunately that format was consigned to the dustbin marked golden goal.
Saints connection – only the damn best non-stripped home kit ever. I would have said the second best non-stripped home kit ever but the sash was promoted after last season. The Xerox kit has been tainted by association, it was like seeing your favourite comedian speak at a Britain First rally.
Australia - FIFA ranking 36, World Cup 2018 odds 500/1
Yes I know we have loads of old enemies, but in sporting terms Australia are the Pompey to Scotland’s Bournemouth (Germany are Man U and France are Arsenal, if you must know). But every englishman loves to beat the aussies.
The embarrassingly names Socceroos have since 2006 pretended they are in Asia for a better chance of reaching the World Cup. They progressed out of their easy qualifying group, letting in only 4 goals and scoring 29 in eight games. They then beat worn torn Syria and drug addled Honduras for a place in Russia. Well done you Socceroos.
Look, you can’t have a piece about Australia without starting one of the sentences with ‘Look’ or ‘Listen’, the ubiquitous Aussie ‘umm’. Look Australia are proof that footballing gods exist, they made them good enough to qualify for big tournaments so they are on the world stage but shit enough to lose a lot, thank you FG’s.
Listen, we don’t mention that game at the Boleyn Ground, in England’s hall of sporting shame its nothing, I mean after our game of cricket this week that loss to the Aussies is well down the list. I know it was at West Ham, a club who has 1966 in their ticket line number, but it's a ground where England have never won and it was a meaningless friendly.
Saints connection – James Beattie's first England cap was in that game, he was hauled off at half time and replaced by Francis Jeffers who got England’s only consultation goal.
So who will join France in progressing to the knock out stages is any one’s guess. Do the Aussies have the fire power to compete with the Danes, probably not. Peru have got their own Russian based star winger, Jefferson Farfan, who will not want to go ‘home’ too early and as a boy of the 70’s I will be rooting for them. But write off the Aussies at your peril, sod it the Socceroos are screwed.
This is also Group C for chance, as in second chance, whilst France stormed their group, Denmark, Peru and the lot from down under all qualified through play off games.
France – FIFA ranking 7, World Cup 2018 odds 7/1
France qualified back in October last year having only lost one game in UEFA Group A to an extra time Swedish winner, take that garlic cheats, whilst it won’t make up for Henry’s handball this son of an Irish women will take anything. That aside Les Bleus have an air of class of late, they took a while to warm up to the world cup and just like the Saints had a great 1980’s where they got to the semis two tournaments in a row. But unlike the hapless Saints they went one better (technically two better) and won the thing in 1998, but they needed home soil to help them, cough cough.
They bombed out of next tournament and then made the next final and then bombed out again, so as the cliché goes will it depend on what France team turns up. No not this time, you could bet your onion bag they will get out of this group with ease, but who will join them?
Saints connection – our best ever player has a French surname, from the word for weaver which is nice and he reputedly said non when Les Bleus came-a-knocking, which is nicer.
Denmark - FIFA ranking 12, World Cup 2018 odds 100/1
Denmark came second in their group and faltered in their quest for automatic qualification with a shock home loss to Montenegro and a failure to beat Romania, which sounds a bit like an England World Cup group campaign. But they smashed down the door to Russia in Dublin when after going one nil down, a green meltdown helped the Danes romp to a 1-5 win with a hat-trick from Eriksen the north London yobbo.
So a part of me should be antiviking, but how can you be with a nation that is the home of Lego, bacon and hygge. That is the art of creating a warm atmosphere, which their fans will create with their blonde hair and their national flag adorned cheeks. The Roligans, as they are known, are the opposite to hooligans with rolig being Danish for calm; they will brighten the terraces but only for a short period as the Hummelers (I couldn’t find a nickname which is obligatory in these write ups) don’t normally hang around for too long.
Saints connection – our very own Pierre-Emile Højbjerg who got his first goal for his country in a 2-1 win in the qualifying group. Good luck PEH.
Peru - FIFA ranking 11, World Cup 2018 odds 150/1
Rooting for the Kiwis in the OFC–CONMEBOL qualification play-off, we all choose a team in this fixture right, I followed the result at work and sadly experienced another football failure, its lucky I have been in training for that all my sporting life. My wife is a Kiwi although she was brought up in Kent, and it would have been nice to see a nation from the only region to not have an automatic qualifying spot. But alas it was Peru who progressed, who themselves were pipped at the post by one point to Columbia, after drawing with them in their last qualifying game.
They don’t have much of a world cup pedigree; they beat Scotland 3-1 in 1978 with the brilliant Clive James stating that the Peruvians had ‘revealed an ability to run faster with the ball than the Scots could run without it’. But as I said they don’t have much of a world cup pedigree and their greatest triumph was possibly a 1-1 draw against Italy with a late goal, which put Italy in danger of not qualifying from their group until they catenaccioed they way out with a third draw, before going on to win the bloody thing. Incidentally the 1982 World Cup was the one where there was a second round of group games, which England, after winning all their first round games, drew their two second round games and went out of the World Cup with out losing a match. Fortunately that format was consigned to the dustbin marked golden goal.
Saints connection – only the damn best non-stripped home kit ever. I would have said the second best non-stripped home kit ever but the sash was promoted after last season. The Xerox kit has been tainted by association, it was like seeing your favourite comedian speak at a Britain First rally.
Australia - FIFA ranking 36, World Cup 2018 odds 500/1
Yes I know we have loads of old enemies, but in sporting terms Australia are the Pompey to Scotland’s Bournemouth (Germany are Man U and France are Arsenal, if you must know). But every englishman loves to beat the aussies.
The embarrassingly names Socceroos have since 2006 pretended they are in Asia for a better chance of reaching the World Cup. They progressed out of their easy qualifying group, letting in only 4 goals and scoring 29 in eight games. They then beat worn torn Syria and drug addled Honduras for a place in Russia. Well done you Socceroos.
Look, you can’t have a piece about Australia without starting one of the sentences with ‘Look’ or ‘Listen’, the ubiquitous Aussie ‘umm’. Look Australia are proof that footballing gods exist, they made them good enough to qualify for big tournaments so they are on the world stage but shit enough to lose a lot, thank you FG’s.
Listen, we don’t mention that game at the Boleyn Ground, in England’s hall of sporting shame its nothing, I mean after our game of cricket this week that loss to the Aussies is well down the list. I know it was at West Ham, a club who has 1966 in their ticket line number, but it's a ground where England have never won and it was a meaningless friendly.
Saints connection – James Beattie's first England cap was in that game, he was hauled off at half time and replaced by Francis Jeffers who got England’s only consultation goal.
So who will join France in progressing to the knock out stages is any one’s guess. Do the Aussies have the fire power to compete with the Danes, probably not. Peru have got their own Russian based star winger, Jefferson Farfan, who will not want to go ‘home’ too early and as a boy of the 70’s I will be rooting for them. But write off the Aussies at your peril, sod it the Socceroos are screwed.
